See, I look at you, and for a second, for a flash in time, I think you get me. I think you’ve unwrapped me from the layers that have kept me trapped all these years. I think you’ve destroyed the walls, one brick at a time. I feel like you can finally see me… finally see the real me. I feel lighter, I feel less covered. I feel naked. But it feels good. Come to think about it, it feels fucking good. For a second, that is. Then I notice that I was simply caught in between one of my many layers, caught, twisted and tangled. I’m trapped in between the layers that blur my eyes, blur my reality, make me see what’s not there, make me believe what’s not true, make me who you see… who everyone sees. But its funny, because I wrapped myself tightly, careful not to let any light, or eyes, shine through. And I built these walls to protect me. To keep me strong and invincible. But what’s funny is that I don’t know how they turned against me. They’re not blocking people out. They’re caging me in, keeping me alone, scared, and vulnerable. And I can’t get out. I can’t break through. I’m too weak. I look at you, this time for more than a second, for more than for a flash in time, and I’m going to let you get me. I’m going to let you unwrap me from these layers. I am. So this is my plea, for someone, for you, for help. This is my plea…
`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
